I'm angry!

Yet again! The news reports of the rape and death of Priyanka Reddy in Hyderabad has sent shock waves – once again. It brings back thoughts of Nirbhaya… What has changed since then? Yes, the law did change and yes, it did become more stringent. But did that stop this crime from happening? Why not? It did not stop it from happening because the system of “justice” in our country is an illusion. It does NOT exist. If it existed, would we be debating about who gets life imprisonment and who gets death and how “inhuman” death sentence is…. The system does not exist because the first people one goes to in such a scenario is the police and there is ZERO training and ZERO sensitivity there to deal with such issues. Is it too much to ask for that an FIR be taken? Is it too much to hope for immediate help when delays can and have caused death? What is this innate sense of voyeurism in our country? Why this shunning of responsibilities? And then come the courts and the dates and the witnesses and the bribery and the shame and the slow death of any hope that justice will be served.

After every such incident, the usual advisories “ she could have been your daughter/sister/mother”. WHY is that establishing of relationship important? Is the fact that the person who was raped and killed another human being too less of a fact that it needs the support of these names? “Don’t talk to strangers”, says another. Why not, I ask? Why should I let go of my inherent nature to trust and be kind and be just another human being simply because YOU cannot guarantee me safety!! “Don’t go to places after dark or which are not well-lighted.” – Is it my job to have street lights and make each and every road and lane and gali safe for each one of us or is it the job of the government that I voted to power and who happily use my tax money to waive off loans of people without my consent to buy more votes?!

As a woman who works in a metropolis and supposedly has access to all the luxuries of the good life, do you think I feel safe? But so much has been done for my safety – there are apps to “track” my safety, buttons to call up my family and friends if I feel unsafe, to have backup phones and backup chargers and backup of everything to help me feel “safe” and “secure” – backup of everything except my life. Only for me, such advisories “come back before 8 pm” “stay back at your friend’s if you are going to be late” “call when you reach” “call when you start” “call every bloody time you breathe” and the minute you don’t call, we know that you stopped breathing!!! Is that it? Is that supposed to be my sense of safety and security and well-being?

To hell with all the inclusion and diversity programs that I have so proudly participated in and even encouraged others to be part of, what was I – delusional?! What use are all those words and rules and laws and smart speaking when as soon as I step out into the “usual” world, I have to grab my purse close to me, adjust my stole/scarf/dupatta/pallu/skirt/shirt/burkha so that nothing shows and then put on a frown, look down at my shoes and navigate my way back home with a prayer on my lips that I reach home safe.

And what do I tell the young ones around me – the girls and boys --- should I say “learn early and don’t talk to strangers” or should I say “trust no one” or should I say “don’t breathe”. What do I tell them?

Each time something like this happens and is allowed to happen, all the steps that we have taken as a society to move towards being “inclusive”, “progressive” and “humane”, the work is undone by 20 years!!! Yes – each time something like this happens, each woman and girl in this country, goes back to a shell and thinks – will it be me next time?

Hell! Am so done with this system and the people who make this society – impotent rogues each single one of them!